Negotiating your salary is a five-step conversation, not a single brave moment where you blurt out a number. Most people lose money not because they lack leverage but because they skip straight from the offer to acceptance without ever making a counter. The process below works for both a new offer and an existing-role raise: research your number, open with a specific ask, hold silence after you say it, handle the two or three pushback lines you will almost certainly hear, and get the final number in writing before you celebrate.
The core idea
A counter is expected in the large majority of offers, and asking rarely costs you the offer itself — companies budget for negotiation before they ever send a number. The risk is not in asking; it is in asking vaguely, with no anchor number and no pause after you say it.
The five-step script
- Research your number before any conversation happens. Pull real comparable ranges from public salary-data sites and your network, not a rough guess. Land on one specific number, not a range — ranges invite the low end.
- Open with the number and stop talking. "Based on my research and the scope of this role, I was expecting something closer to $X. Can we get there?" Then stop. The next person to talk usually loses ground, and silence after your ask is doing real work even though it feels uncomfortable.
- Handle pushback with a prepared line, not improvisation. Have a response ready for the two most common objections before you're in the room: "that's outside our band" and "we don't have room right now."
- Ask about total compensation, not just base. If the base number will not move, ask about signing bonus, equity, an earlier review date, or extra vacation days. A locked base-salary band is rarely the whole story.
- Get the final number in writing before you say yes. A verbal agreement is not a commitment. Reply to the offer email summarizing exactly what was agreed and ask for written confirmation before your start date.
Their pushback vs. your response
| What they say |
What you say |
| "That's outside our band for this level." |
"I understand the band — is there flexibility in signing bonus or an accelerated review instead?" |
| "We don't have room in the budget right now." |
"Would you be open to revisiting this at a 90-day review with a specific number attached?" |
| "This is our best and final offer." |
"I appreciate that. Can you help me understand what's driving the ceiling here?" |
| "Other candidates accepted this range." |
"That's helpful context. Given my specific experience with X, is there room to reconsider?" |
| "We need an answer today." |
"I want to say yes to the right offer — can I have until a specific day to review the full details?" |
Common mistakes
- Naming a range instead of a number. "Somewhere between $90k and $100k" gets you $90k almost every time. State the higher, specific figure and let them counter down from there if they must.
- Filling the silence after your ask. The instinct to soften an ask with "but I'm flexible" the moment it leaves your mouth erases the leverage the ask just created. Say the number, then wait.
- Negotiating before you have a written offer. Verbal enthusiasm is not a number. Do not start the real negotiation until you have the actual offer letter or email in hand.
- Accepting on the spot. Even a great offer deserves 24-48 hours before you respond. Asking for time to review costs nothing and is standard practice on both sides of the table.
FAQ
Will asking for more money cost me the offer?
Rescinded offers over a reasonable counter are rare — companies build negotiation room into their process before the offer ever goes out. A calm, specific counter is expected, not risky.
What if I do not have a competing offer to use as leverage?
You do not need one. Cite market data, the scope of the role, and your specific relevant experience instead. A competing offer helps, but it is not the only form of leverage.
Should I negotiate over email or on a call?
Open the ask on a call or video if possible — tone carries better and pushback is easier to handle in real time. Always follow up in writing to confirm whatever gets agreed.
How do I negotiate a raise instead of a new offer?
Same script, different context: bring specific results from the last six to twelve months, name your number, and ask for a specific timeline if the answer is not yes today.
Where to go next
If the number lands but the flexibility does not, see return-to-office negotiation tips for the same script applied to schedule instead of pay. If you're negotiating as part of a bigger move, how to pivot careers at 40 covers positioning experience for a new field, and how to ask better questions sharpens the follow-up questions in the table above.